Sharing Circle: What To Expect at a Women’s Circle Gathering
Why is a support circle worth my precious time?
What is a women’s circle anyway?
A women’s circle (also called a sharing or sister circle) is a time to gather and connect. It’s a place for women to come together and witness each other’s lives. A women’s circle is a gathering for anyone who identifies as a woman. Individuals are invited to share what is on their mind and heart with a group of loving women, free of judgment, opinions or advice. We listen deeply and response-free, offering support and love for whatever she is experiencing right now.
A sharing circle is right for any woman who is looking for connection. Perhaps you have something heavy on your mind that you need to process out loud. You’re looking for that feeling of catharsis when you finally get something off your chest. Perhaps you don’t wish to share at all and you just need some validation that you aren’t alone in your experience. There’s no right way to show up for a sharing circle. You are welcome as you are.
The Bread & Roses Club
In an effort to bring women together in this way, I’ve created a group I’m calling The Bread & Roses Club. It is my hope to bring more traditional women’s circles to a broader audience. A traditional women’s circle may include a moon sign horoscope, a flower crown, and a mandala of petals. I strive to create circles that are accessible to all. There’s room for those who want to wear a flower crown and there’s room for those that don’t. The essential parts of the women’s circle, the parts where the magic happens, is present in any women’s circle you’ll attend.
What should I expect when attending a Bread & Roses Women’s Circle?
Ideally, circles would be in person. For accessibility, I decided to hold my circles virtually via zoom, at least to start. What we lose from not being in person, we gain in the convenience of being able to login from anywhere, home being the ideal for many. Here’s an outline of a typical circle:
Arrival
With cameras on or off, we start with a present moment arrival meditation. We visualize being in a circle of women and what that might look and feel like. This meditation is an invitation to be fully present for the next hour.
Agreements
Once we feel present and the setting has been established, I present the agreements. The agreements are the most important part of the women’s circle. Our agreements are as follows:
Maintain confidentiality
If you’re in crisis, you agree to seek professional help. This session is not a replacement for mental health intervention.
Be present and limit distractions, when possible (cell phones away)
No advice, opinions or feedback. Practice no-response listening.
The last one is a contributing factor to the magic of a women’s circle. This is where it differs from girl’s night or brunch with friends. In a sharing circle, we listen intently and with love, but we provide zero feedback. Unlike your friends, the sisters in your circle just listen and witness you. In my virtual circles, emojis are enabled. It’s common to see a heart or a hand clap emoji during or after a share.
Introductions
Once it’s clear that we all understand the agreements, it’s time for introductions. The Bread & Roses Club currently exists on an invitation-only system. Each member has to be invited to the group by a friend. This friend nominates a woman in her life that has shown up for her in some way. She introduces her nominee to the group and shares what makes this woman so amazing!
Sharing
Once everyone is familiar with one another, we open the circle up for sharing. Gatherers decide if they want to share what’s on their mind or hearts, or, perhaps, just listen. I have found that women get the most out of hearing from other women. Listening to other women can feel very validating. It becomes clear that you aren’t alone in your struggles or in your shame.
Sharing can also be cathartic, should participants choose to do so. Sometimes, it’s clear that a woman has something she needs to get off her chest. We listen as she unburdens the weight she’s been carrying around. It is very moving to watch a woman as she visibly becomes lighter and more free after a sharing session.
Closing
We close the circle with another visualization and a few mantras. Gatherers can take this feeling of weightlessness and connection with them as they move on with their day. We walk away with a sense of belonging and well-being that we didn’t have when we arrived. We are carried away by a sense of peace.
Is it really worth my precious time?
Yes, it really is. I’ve done the best I can to describe it here, but you need to experience it for yourself. You don’t have to leave your house or do a workout to get the mental and physical health benefits that connection can provide.
Don’t make the mistake of worrying about wasting an hour of your sacred time. Your cup will be full as you proceed with your life as usual with a renewed sense of community, connection and belonging.
Where did the name Bread & Roses come from?
The name Bread and Roses is a callback to the suffragette Helen Todd in 1911 and her protests for labor rights. “Give us bread and roses too” they marched and protested for decent working conditions and fair pay. But these female protesters didn’t just want to survive, they wanted to thrive. By asking for bread AND roses, they were demanding access to life’s delights - music, time and peace of mind. By naming this club Bread and Roses, we are insisting on taking the time to stand in the sunshine, to put down our responsibilities, and insisting upon thriving (and not just surviving). They even had a protest song called Bread & Roses. You’ll have to attend the next circle to hear me sing it.
As we go marching, marching
In the beauty of the day
A million darkened kitchens
A thousand mill lofts gray
Are touched with all the radiance
That a sudden sun discloses
For the people hear us singing
Bread and roses, bread and roses
Are you ready to try a circle?
